Modern medicine, isn’t it wonderful?

Doctors in the Czech Republic have created an artificial vagina for an unidentified woman whose love canal was so narrow that she could no longer have sex. The woman suffers from an extreme case of scleroderma, an autoimmune disease that causes hard, thickened areas of skin.

She was sent to University Hospital in the town of Plzen, Czech Republic, after her gynecologist found she was so narrow it was not even possible to carry out an examination.

To try and help her condition, surgeons decided to use a technique called a Mesh Augmented Vaginal Reconstruction. The mesh that was used, came from the intestines of a pig.

Via The UK Daily Mail:

Pig tissue is often used because its genetic make up is similar to that of humans.

For over 30 years, scientists have been using pigs in a number of medical fields, including dermatology and cardiology.

Scientists have even re-grown human leg muscles using implants made of pig bladder tissue.

During surgery to treat the Czech patient, surgeons made an incision to enlarge the narrowed area.

They then used the mesh made from pig’s intestine to widen the walls of the woman’s vagina.

And following the success of the operation, the doctors now plan to publish a scientific paper on the technique.

Vladimir Kalis, head doctor of the gynaecological-obstetrical clinic at the hospital, told CEN: ‘Two years ago, the woman started to have problems during sex.

‘The illness had narrowed the vaginal entrance so much that even gynaecological examinations were not possible.’

Dr Kalis said many women suffer with the same problem – but most are too embarrassed to ask for help.

He said: ‘In the case of the patient we operated on, she had been given various medications by her gynaecologist but nothing helped, so she referred to us.’

He acknowledged that vaginal surgery was not common and was usually to performed for the opposite problem.

He added: ‘The material used is referred to as pig net.

‘Its thickness is about one millimetre.

‘Over time human tissue will be created around the net and the pig net will be absorbed by the body.’

He added that the surgery lasted about one hour and the patient left hospital after five days. Read More…

Wow, they are making everything taste like bacon these days.

There is religiosity, there is blind faith and then there is Kaling Wald, 50, of Hamilton, Ontario — who is just plain fucking insane. Wald’s husband Peter, 52, died in March of last year. Did she do what any grieving spouse would do, mourn the loss of her dear husband, have a funeral , grieve while holding her family together as they continue to live their lives.

This undated Google street view image, shows the van that Peter and Kaling Wald drove their family around in, parked outside their Hamilton, Ontario home.

No, she did none of this, because as I have previously said, she’s fucking insane.

Peter Wald suffered from diabetes and had developed a serious infection in his foot, however the devoutly religious man refused to seek medical attention and instead that “God would provide a cure.” Well the big guy upstairs was a little busy and Peter “slipped into a coma”. His devoted wife continued to sleep at his side however, after a few days she started to get a little worried when she had noticed signs of stomach bloat and rigor mortis in the corpse she had been sharing her bed with.

Mrs. Wald, being the devoted religious nut-job that she is, wrapped her dead husbands body in blakents that she secured down in duct tape, leaving his feet to stick out however. She then sealed the door and air vents up, to protect the family from the smells of rotting death coming from corpse dad. Finally she told her poor brainwashed children that if they all “prayed hard enough,” God would bring their dead father back to life.

Via The Hamilton Spectator:

On Monday, Kaling, 50, pleaded guilty to failing to notify police or the coroner that her husband had died due to a sickness that was not being treated by a doctor. It’s the first known case of its kind (involving the resurrection belief) in Canada.

The criminal charges originally laid in the case – neglect of duty regarding a dead body and offering an indignity to a body – were withdrawn and replaced with that single charge under the Coroner’s Act.

Kaling had no ill intent, all agreed. As assistant crown attorney Janet Booy put it, the devout Christian woman’s faith had “tainted and warped her better judgment.”

“We were trusting God…we thought, ‘OK Lord, you know better,” Kaling told the Spectator after court Monday, with lawyer Peter Boushy by her side. Read More…

My favorite quote from the article, is this gem from the looney Mrs. Wald, “It was unusual, yes. It was certainly not normal. And we won’t do that again…laws exist and we know that now.”

It’s fucking idiots like this woman that open up the door for dipshit atheists to blast all religious people, including the vast majority of religious people who are normal.

In a bid to become a reality TV star, Jasmine Tridevil, 21, claims to have spent $20,000 to add a third breast.

I had probably just about turned 13 around the time that the original Arnold Schwarzenegger version of the movie Total Recall was released to HBO, or whatever premium cable channel got it. I remember getting a pretty good chuckle out of the scene with the Martian girl with the third boob. I was in the 8th grade and didn’t get too much of an opportunity to see regular unexposed funbags, yet alone 33% more boob.

Flash forward 24 years later and now a 21-year-old Florida woman has had a third boob added in a bid to become a “reality television star.” Jasmine Tridevil, which apparently is not her real name, claims that she has spent $20,000 in plastic surgery and how now hired a camera crew to follow her around and document her “struggles.”

I’ve used the word “claims” because, all of the pictures and videos floating around the net come from her. Not to mention the fact that adding a third boob is not exactly the type of surgery a respectable plastic surgeon would do.

Via The Daily Mail:

The ethical code outlined by the American Board of Plastic Surgeons dictates that ‘the principal objective of the medical profession is to render services to humanity with full respect for human dignity.’

Cosmetic surgeons are under strict guidelines to solely ‘enhance the norm’ of a patient’s body.

However, Tridevil claims she found a surgeon who agreed to carry out the unusual operation on the grounds that she kept their name a secret.

She says the medic took tissue from her abdomen and used it to fashion the third breast – a procedure commonly used for normal breast enhancements.

The massage therapist, who recently celebrated her 21st birthday, has shared dozens of pictures of her new look in custom made bikinis on her Facebook fan page in a bid to convince followers the surgery was legitimate.

And she has proudly declared that she been disowned by her mother and sister, who ran out the room in disgust when they saw what she had done.

‘My mum ran out of the door. She won’t talk to me. She won’t let my sister talk to me,’ Tridevil said.

‘My dad… he really isn’t happy. He is kind of ashamed of me but he accepted it.’ Read More…

I think it’s pretty disgusting, but I’d still motorboat them.

A 38-year-old woman in Scotland went to the hospital complaining of severe weight loss and lethargy. Doctors soon discovered that the source of her ailments was a sextoy lodged inside her body for almost a decade.

The patient’s case – reported in The Journal of Sexual Medicine – is the first time a sex toy has been left inside a woman for as long as a decade.

Via The UK Daily Mail:

Surgical removal of the item at Aberdeen Royal Infirmary revealed it to be a five inch (11cm)-long sex toy.

Medical staff were even more taken back when the woman revealed she had used the sex toy with her partner ten years ago.

She also admitted she was under the influence of alcohol at the time – and claimed she couldn’t remember removing it or not.

The woman had a normal IQ, no signs of depression or psychosis and had not been subject to any abuse, according to the case report.

But the sex toy had caused her potentially life-threatening damage.

The woman was suffering from a rare ‘vesicovaginal fistula’ – an abnormal tract which allows urine to flow into the vagina.

She also had an obstructive uropathy, where a blockage in the bladder causes urine to back up into the kidneys.

After removing the sex toy, doctors managed to repair the damage and the woman was later discharged.

One doctor at the hospital, who was not willing to comment on the patient’s specific case, confirmed it was highly unusual for such a large foreign object to go unnoticed in the majority of instances – by patients or their partners.

This is because the vagina is full of nerve endings and is extremely sensitive, he says. Read More…

Wow. I have nothing to add to this.

Here comes some great news for those people who’ve ever had to fart on a bus, or an airplane or in any other public place. No longer is there any need to be worried, no longer do you have to cower in shame or release a test fart. You can fart freely, knowing that your gas may help save lives.

Via The Western Daily Press:

The smell of flatulence has secret health benefits – and could help stave off cancer, strokes, heart attacks and dementia, scientists have revealed.

Hydrogen sulfide is one of a number of potent smelly gases produced by bacteria as it breaks down food in the gut.

It is toxic in large doses but in tiny amounts it helps protect cells and fight illness, according to boffins at Exeter University.

When cells become stressed by disease they try to draw in enzymes to generate their own minute quantities of hydrogen sulfide.

The chemical helps to preserve mitochondria, which drive energy production in blood vessel cells and regulate inflammation, and without it the cell can switch off and die.

Researchers have thus come up with a new compound named AP39 to assist the body in producing just the right amount of hydrogen sulfide that it needs.

They believe it will help prevent or reverse mitochondrial damage, which is a key strategy in treating conditions such as stroke, heart failure, diabetes, arthritis, dementia and ageing. READ MORE…

Twins tend to share things a lot, however a pair of Australian sisters take the concept to a whole new level. Not only do Anna and Lucy DeCinque share the same genetic make-up, the same Facebook account and the same freakish love for horrible plastic surgery — they also share the same live-in boyfriend.

Via Woman’s Day:

While it isn’t your ordinary relationship, the electrical mechanic learned very quickly that the rules are the same and what you do for one twin, you must do to the other.

“It was demanding in the beginning, but now I know better,” says Ben.

“It takes the spontaneity out of it sometimes, but everything has to be equal with these two.”

The shy fitness fanatic found himself in the spotlight earlier this year when he was identified as the boyfriend of 28-year-old surgically enhanced twins Anna and Lucy.

Now, the girls and their man, who live together along with the girls’ mother Gina, are happy to speak out about their unorthodox arrangement.

“The main question we get asked is, ‘How does one guy keep up with two girls in the bedroom?’” laughs Lucy. “Put it this way, we’re very active girls and he needs twice the energy!      Read More…

I like boobies and all, but them girls are nasty. And really, really creepy looking.

Boobs. What can’t they do?

Sheyla Hershey and her airbags

Via the UK’s Daily Mail:

A 32-year-old model who held the record for the world’s largest implants has walked away from a car crash after her breasts acted as an airbag.

Sheyla Hershey, who has 38KKK breasts, was driving home near Houston, Texas, after a Super Bowl party on Sunday when she crashed into a tree.

The mother was charged with drunk-driving after the incident and allegedly was not wearing a seatbelt when she lost control of her Ford Mustang.

Her car spun around and hit a tree during the crash but she denied the drunk-driving charge in court on Monday, reported the Daily Mirror.

Despite the crash Hershey, who once had 38MMM breasts, avoided injury because her huge bust protected the rest of her body from harm.

Boobs save lives.

This just has to be turned into a movie, is Troma Entertainment still making films?

From Fox 8:

STRONGSVILLE, Ohio— There is a banana at large in Strongsville.

Police say that someone dressed up as a banana and attacked the Wireless Center’s mascot, a gorilla, last week.

“I noticed a kid in the bushes. Then he just emerged, dressed up as a banana, and sprinted as fast as he could at our gorilla,” said Brandon Parham, the manager. “The kid just speared our gorilla.”
Parham and another employee witnessed the attack.

“The kid was in mid-air, flying. He just looked like a Spartan from that movie ‘300,’ except he was a banana,” added Parham.

The Wireless Center uses the gorilla as an advertising tool on Mondays, Tuesdays and Fridays.

Now is this all true or is it just guerilla, err… gorilla marketing?