Police in LaPorte, Indiana, reporting to a call from JJ’s Sideout Bar & Grill, totally harshed a dude’s mellow as he was just trying to have a good time while licking a toad’s backside. I mean, who hasn’t done that?
On arrival, officers observed bar security staff standing on the sidewalk with Richard Mullins, 41, of LaPorte. Mullins was barefoot and carrying his sandals.
Security staff told police that Mullins started to enter the bar and was asked for proper identification. He allegedly ignored the request and refused to speak with staff. He was advised that if he didn’t provide ID he would have to leave. After not producing anything, he was escorted outside and told to leave the property.
He proceeded to dance around in the parking lot, picked up a toad and began licking it, according to witnesses.
While police spoke with Mullins, he remained on the public sidewalk, dancing. He was warned not to return onto JJ’s property or he would be arrested. Read More…
Of course he was arrested, because a few minutes later he returned to the bar’s parking lot with another toad in hand.
Ahh, young love.
A Northeast Ohio couple were arrested this past Saturday morning while joyriding through town in the buff.
Westlake police caught the couple after a tipster reported seeing them cavorting in the parking lot of a business park, its unknown if its the same Westlake business park that former Ohio Gubernatorial Ed Fitzgerald was caught canoodling with his Irish side piece.
When police found the couple, Alexandria Mauer, 24, was found easting a slice of pizza while driving naked. Her 33-year-old passenger, Kenneth Gillespie, also naked, was holding a beer can between his feet.
The driver, 24-year-old Alexandria Mauer of Bay Village, is charged with suspicion of drunken driving. She refused a breath test at the Westlake Police Department.
The passenger, 33-year-old Kenneth Gillespie of Cleveland, is charged with disorderly conduct while intoxicated, an open container violation and public indecency.
The officer determined the two were drunk and ordered them to dress before taking them into custody, according to a police report. Gillespie urinated in the backseat of the police car on the way to the police station. Read more…
Gillespie, who was already on probation for prior drug charges, decided to take a leak in the back of the police car after arrest. He was charged with disorderly conduct, open container and public indecency and was released just after 9 a.m. After being given an old pair of jail pants and shoes to wear home.
Mauer was arrested for DUI and then released shortly thereafter to a family member around 2 a.m. However, less than an hour later, she was again spotted walking down the street, this time with clothes on. According to police she got in an argument with her driver and jumped out of the car. She was again arrested for disorderly conduct and public intoxication.
Last week brave and honorable government officials in Overton, TX, took down two violent criminals who were poisoning local residents by selling beverages without the proper permits.
No, that’s not what happened. Not even close.
Some government assholes shut down a lemonade stand run by two little girls who were trying to raise enough money for a Father’s Day present for their dad.
OVERTON, TX (KLTV) – A little summer fun was spoiled by police in Overton, and state health laws. Andria and Zoey Green wanted to raise $105 for a Father’s Day present.
“We were trying to raise some money to take our dad to Splash Kingdom,” 8-year-old Andria explains.
Their mother, Sandi Evans says her daughters have an entrepreneurial spirit.
“The girls are always into making their own money,” Evans says.
The girls initially wanted to start a paper route, but decided on a lemonade stand to make money more quickly.
“A code enforcement officer and the chief, she called me to the side and said we needed a permit,” Sandi recalls.
The City agreed to waive the $150 fee for a ‘Peddler’s Permit,” but the health department would prove a bigger problem.
Police Chief Clyde Carter explains, “It is a lemonade stand but they also have a permit that they are required to get.”
Texas House Bill 970, or the Texas Baker’s Bill, prohibits the sale of food which requires time or temperature control to prevent spoilage. Since lemonade technically must be refrigerated to prevent the growth of bacteria, by law, the girls can not sell it without an inspection and permit. Read More…
The most asinine part of the story is that the fucking assholes who busted up the lemonade stand know that it was a pretty shitty thing to do, but they are going to keep on doing it anyways.
“We have to follow by the state health guidelines,” said Carter. “They have to have a permit if they’re going to do the lemonade stands.”
For the mental midgets out their that say ‘the police are just doing their job, they have to enforce the laws even if they are stupid.’ Here are a few stupid laws currently on the books in Texas, that I seriously doubt are enforced:
Police officers can, and should use discretion when choosing which laws to enforce. You’re not a good cop that’s just doing your job by shutting down a child’s lemonade stand, you are a fucking asshole.
A 22-year-old woman from Honduras carrying over 3 pounds of liquid cocaine hidden inside her breast implants was arrested at the airport in Bogota, Colombia yesterday.
Paola Deyanira Sabillon, was attempting to travel to Spain when her nervousness attracted the suspicion of security.
Via The Mirror UK:
The surgery to fit the liquid cocaine implants is understood to have taken place at a clinic in Pereira, western Colombia.
Police in Pereira are trying to identify the clinic and discover how many other women have agreed to smuggle drugs the same way as human mules.
Police chief Humberto Guatibonza said: “She confessed she had drugs in breast implants and that she was going to be met in Barcelona by a group of people including a doctor who would operate on her to remove them.” Read More…
Sabillon’s fake fun bags were removed at a Bogota hospital where she is also being treated for an infection.
Madam’s Organ, a popular bar and live music venue in Washington DC’s Adams Morgan neighborhood was recently fined $500. The reason?
Last year while a band was playing there, the drummer cracked open a window a bit to let out a fart.
According to the report, an Alcohol Beverage Regulation Administration (ABRA) inspector personally observed a live band playing “directly in front of one of the establishment’s ground floor windows” between 1:30 and 1:33 a.m. on June 22, 2014.
In April, Madam’s Organ General Manager Carlos Wilcox testified at an ABRA hearing that he “personally closed the windows during the performers’ first break of the night,” and that the band’s drummer “needed air and cracked a window.”
Adams Morgan owner Bill Duggan admits the drummer did crack open the window slightly. Why?
“He opened the window to let [a] fart out,” says Duggan. “He cracked it open for five minutes, then the inspector showed up.”
“Twenty f—–g years with not one violation and this is what they came up with,” Duggan says. “People get stabbed and shot in these other establishments. In ours, someone farts and cracks a window and they spend a year on it.” Read More…
The fucking government, I swear…
Girls, when are you going to learn lady gardens are not for hiding things, especially not guns. Could you imagine what might happen if the safety was off? Hoo-ha’s aren’t holsters.
Jennifer McCarthy, 48, ex-wife of Pulitzer Prize winning novelist Cormac McCarthy was arrested last week after pulling a gun out of her bearded clam and pointed it at her boyfriend during an argument… about aliens.
To everyone out there with the surname McCarthty, do not name your daughters Jenny, there’s like a 99% chance she’ll end up being bat-shit insane.
Via The Albuquerque Journal:
According to a police statement filed in Magistrate Court, McCarthy’s boyfriend told a deputy responding to a disturbance that McCarthy started performing a sex act with a silver handgun, asked, “Who is crazy, you or me?” then took the gun and pointed it at his head.
The gun came into play after the couple had argued about space aliens and McCarthy left the couple’s home on Aventura Road in Santa Fe, according to the boyfriend’s account.
When she came back, she went into the bedroom and came out dressed in lingerie and with the handgun in her private parts.
The boyfriend, who was not identified in the police statement, grabbed the gun after she pointed it at his head. He said he was afraid she was going to pull the trigger.
The boyfriend went into the bathroom and put the gun in the toilet. He told the deputy that when McCarthy went to retrieve the gun, he got it himself and put it in a trash can outdoors. Read More…
McCarthy’s ex-husband Cormac McCarthy is the author of the 2005 novel No Country For Old Men.
But she does deserve a thorough pat down.
I don’t know why you would want to film a hot chick in a bikini getting blasted in the ass with gummi bears, but quite frankly I don’t care.
I love America.
So the Pope said something about Al Gore’s second biggest invention…
Naked, high on meth and hiding near railroad tracks is no way to live your life…
Pasco Sheriff’s deputies captured Kenneth Michael Brown, 30, around 1:15 a.m. Friday along the railroad track near Pattie Road in Crystal Springs. An anonymous tip helped lead detectives to the area.
Brown was still naked, likely high on meth, and had a gun, according to deputies. He was treated for minor cuts and scrapes at an area hospital and then transported to the Land O’ Lakes Detention Center.
More than 100 officers were involved in the manhunt for Brown including deputies from Pasco, Hillsborough, and Polk counties, including K9 units, teamed up to search for him Thursday in the area between State Road 39 and US 301.
Four crime scenes were established over the course of the chase and five people in total that Brown pointed guns at, Sheriff Chris Nocco said in a press conference Friday.
“There was a clear and present danger this individual was going to harm somebody,” Nocco said. “This guy was a time bomb about to explode and in our minds about to take somebody’s life.” Read More…
Brown’s not a very smart criminal, though most aren’t, his crime spree began two days before he was arrested as he broke into a home stealing a bag of coins and three handguns. He had apparently dropped the coins alongside the property’s fence and returned the next day to retrieve them.
Via The Tamps Sun Times:
The homeowner was home when brown returned and chased him off his property.
Brown then saw a 10-year-old boy while he was fleeing, and asked to be let into the boy’s apartment. The boy said ‘no’ and went to alert his parents but Brown attempted breaking-in anyways.
When he was unsuccessful breaking into the apartment, he ran to another apartment complex where he pulled a gun on a woman unloading groceries and stole her car.
Police say he wasn’t in the car long before he abandoned it and targeted another female driver. This time the woman gave him a ride, but she dropped him off near the woods and was left unharmed.
Brown took off into the woods, but by then, deputies were not far behind him.
Deputies were finally able to track him down near some train tracks early the morning of June 12. Brown was completely naked when police took him into custody. Investigators assume he ditched his clothes sometime during the manhunt. Read More…
Hermann ‘Pascha’ Müller, owner of a brothel in Salzburg, Austria, is sick and tired of what the tax rates his business has been paying out, and has vowed to no longer be “the tax office’s pimp.” So what is he doing about it?
He’s giving out free sex to customers at his house of ill repute and paying the normal salaries of the working girls out of his own pocket.
German-born Müller told the Kronen Zeitung that he’s already had to “turn away hundreds of disappointed customers” as he has had a full house since the “summer special” went on offer.
The stunt has been great publicity for him and he says that he plans to continue it for four to eight weeks. Drinks are on the house and Müller says that he is paying the prostitutes’ usual hourly rate out of his own pocket.
“In the last decade I have paid taxes of almost €5 million,” Müller said. “The problem is, the tax office wants more and more, and they are not cracking down on illegal street and apartment prostitution.”
He said that the summer special would be offset by any profits made in his other establishments, and that Pasha would not be liable for any tax during the special offer. Read More…
You can’t make this stuff up.
Via The Post And Courier:
A Charleston County sheriff’s deputy was arrested after police said she kneed a man in the groin for jumping into photos at a party.
Deputy Kimberly Poirier, 47, is charged with third-degree assault and battery.
Police said a group of women were taking photos at the end of the dock near 2300 Tall Sail Drive when a man decided to “photo bomb” their pictures. Poirier, who knew the man, walked over to him and kneed him in the groin area, Francis said.
The man refused to be treated by EMS and didn’t want to go to a hospital, Francis said. Read More…
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